Women's Circle: Stoking the Fire | Desire, Pleasure & Aliveness

When you were small, you knew exactly what you wanted.

You didn't think about it. You felt it and you moved towards it. You wanted to run, so you ran. You wanted to spin until you were dizzy, so you spun. You wanted to be held, so you climbed into someone's lap.

There was no gap between the wanting and the doing. No negotiation. No "is this reasonable?" No "what will people think?" Just a pull — and you followed it.

At some point, that changed.

You started checking. Editing. Putting other people's needs ahead of the pull. And eventually the pull got so quiet you stopped hearing it altogether. Not because it disappeared. Because you stopped listening.

This circle is where you start listening again.

The Concept

Most women have lost touch with what they actually want. Not because they don't want things — but because they've spent so long doing what needs doing, being what others need them to be, that desire has gone underground. It's still there. It's just been unlistened-to for a very long time.

This session is about finding it again. Not through force. Not through performance. Through slowing down, turning inward, and asking your body a question it may not have been asked in years: what do you want?

We begin with a guided desire body scan — not looking for tension or relaxation, but for wanting. Moving through each part of the body and asking: what does this part of me actually want? Some parts will be loud. Some will be silent. Some will surprise you.

Then we explore something most women have never been taught — the difference between sexual drive, desire, and arousal. Three different things, usually lumped together as "sex drive." When your drive changes — through menopause, Medic*tion, life — it can feel like your sexuality has gone. It hasn't. You just need a different way to find it. This conversation changes everything.

And then we practise wanting. Out loud or silently. Starting small — I want warmth, I want softness — and letting it deepen. I want to be touched slowly. I want to feel alive. I want pleasure. Letting the wants come from your body, not your head. And noticing what happens when you let yourself want without editing, without judging, without making it smaller.

What This Opens

• Desire — not the hormonal kind that arrives on a schedule. The deeper kind. The quiet pull towards what makes you feel alive
• Permission — to want things. For yourself. Without justifying them
• Sensation — warmth, tingling, openness. Your body responding to your own wanting
• Clarity — knowing the difference between what you actually want and what you think you should want
• Aliveness — the feeling of being connected to your own longing again, after years of putting it aside

What You'll Experience

A guided desire body scan — moving through each part of your body and asking what it wants. Not relaxation. Discovery
An honest conversation about drive, desire and arousal — why they're different and why it matters
An embodied want exercise — practising desire out loud, from the body. Starting small and letting it deepen
Space to notice what your body does when you let yourself want
One want to take home — and one small action to honour it this week

What to Expect

This is a quieter, more inward session. We sit, we lie down, we listen. The power is not in movement — it is in naming what you want and feeling your body's response.

This circle is intimate — a maximum of eight women in a home setting in North London. Everything is an invitation, never an instruction. You share only what you choose to. You go only as deep as feels right.

Whether this is your first circle or you've been coming all year, you are welcome here exactly as you are. Especially if you arrive thinking "I don't know what I want." That is the perfect starting point.

About your facilitator:

Melanie Knight is a Certified Sexological Bodyworker and Somatic Sex Educator with over 15 years' coaching experience. Former Secretary of the Association of Certified Sexological Bodyworkers (ACSB), she creates spaces where women can safely explore their relationship with their bodies, without pressure or agenda. Her approach is trauma-informed, consent-based, and always honours where you are right now.

What others say:

"Melanie makes the women's group an amazing relaxed and often fun space. It's a place of sharing within a safe container of like-minded women. Within the group we recognise we are all on our own unique journey of discovery. I have learnt much about boundaries. Through the many topics covered I am becoming more authentic and empowered." — Jane
Coming next:

In June, we celebrate the Summer Solstice with Midsummer Blaze — the longest day of the year, an evening circle, and an invitation to let yourself be seen. Details coming soon.

2026 Circle Calendar — Embodying the Fire Horse:

✓ January — Shedding the Snake — 25th Jan
✓ February — Igniting Your Senses — 22nd Feb
✓March — Boundaries as Liberation — 22nd Mar
✓April — Unbridled — 26th Apr
★May — Stoking the Fire — 17th May
June — Midsummer Blaze ☀️ — 21st Jun (5pm)
July — Fuel for the Fire — 26th Jul
August — Adorning the Temple — 23rd Aug
September — Heart Fire — 27th Sep
October — What Fire Reveals — 18th Oct
November — Sacred Vessel — 22nd Nov
December — Tending the Embers 🕯️ — 13th Dec (3pm)

Info: Arrive, settle into the space, meet other women. Teas and coffee available

Info: Welcome & intention setting

Info: Guided breathwork to arrive fully in the body and senses

Info: Guided practices exploring what your body actually wants. Includes a desire body scan, an honest conversation about drive, desire and arousal, and an embodied wanting exercise. Inward, gentle, powerful.

Info: Time to reflect, share (optional), and land what you've discovered

Info: Integration, grounding, and gentle close to honour the work we've done together.

Event Venue

N11, Friern Barnet, London, United Kingdom

Concerts, fests, parties, meetups - all the happenings, one place.

Get App