Tiffany Watt Smith & Sheila Liming: Making Time, Making Friends

TPL presents cultural historian Tiffany Watt Smith and author Sheila Liming in conversation with host Scaachi Koul at the Toronto Reference Library's Appel Salon.

Why is it so hard to make and keep friends as adults? Research shows stark gender differences—men report having fewer close friends and struggle more with emotional intimacy, while women's friendships, though often deeper, face their own pressures around time, competing responsibilities, and competition. Meanwhile, our digital lives offer the illusion of closeness, replacing spontaneous, unstructured time together with transactional exchanges. We curate rather than confide. We scroll rather than sit together.

Cultural historian Tiffany Watt Smith, author of Bad Friend: How Women Revolutionized Modern Friendship, combines memoir and cultural history to challenge the impossible ideals placed on female friendship. Exploring jealousy, competition, and the messy realities of women's relationships throughout history, Watt Smith asks why women's friendships are held to standards of perfection that no relationship can meet. Meanwhile, author and cultural critic Sheila Liming, whose book Hanging Out: The Radical Power of Killing Time is a manifesto for reclaiming unstructured social time, revealing how our hyperscheduled, productivity-obsessed culture has stripped away the very conditions that friendships need to flourish: time, space, and permission to just be together without purpose or performance.

How do we make space for friendships that are honest rather than perfect, messy rather than idealized? Can we reclaim friendship as a radical act of presence in a world designed to keep us distracted and isolated? And what role does simply "hanging out", unproductive, unoptimized time together, play in building the authentic connections we're missing?

Question and answer session and book signing to follow. Books available for purchase.

About this Event's Guests:

Tiffany Watt Smith

Sheila Liming

Scaachi Koul

Read More:

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This event is part of our signature Salon Series, where we host local and international authors, artists and thinkers in conversation about their new books and big ideas.

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PLAN YOUR VISIT:

Location: Bram and Bluma Appel Salon, Toronto Reference Library (789 Yonge Street), 2nd floor

Time: Doors open 6:00pm, Event starts 7:00pm.

Tickets: Free registration required.

Ticket policy: We oversell these events to make sure that the greatest number of people have an opportunity to attend. Tickets are guaranteed until 6:45pm or until capacity is reached. Any remaining space will be opened up to the rush line beginning at 6:45pm. Seating first come, first served. Tickets do not guarantee seats.

Bar: Beer/wine available for purchase (debit/credit only).

Accessibility: TPL is committed to accessibility. If you are Deaf or have a disability and would like to request accommodation for this event, please contact [email protected] or 416-393-7099 at least three weeks prior to the event.

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Information Collection Notice: The personal information on this form is collected by the Toronto Public Library under the Public Libraries Act, sections 20(a), 20(c), and 20(d). The information will only be used for event and program registration, delivery and evaluation. Registrants may be contacted to fill out a brief survey following the program. Questions about how the library handles your information can be directed to Answerline staff at [email protected], 416-397-5981, 789 Yonge Street, Toronto ON M4W 2G8.

Event Venue & Nearby Stays

Bram & Bluma Appel Salon, Toronto Reference Library, Toronto, Canada

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