Name: If I Had Legs I'd Kick You
Start: 2025-11-21T19:00:00-05:00
Location: The Film House At Main Street Landing Performing Arts Center

With her life crashing down around her, Linda (Rose Byrne) attempts to navigate her child’s mysterious illness, her absent husband, a missing person, and an increasingly hostile relationship with her therapist (Conan O’Brien).
Mary Bronstein’s long-in-the-works follow up to her anxiety-ridden debut, Yeast, follows the stressful daily routine of Linda as she navigates a variety of crises. She is a therapist stretched to her limit who is taking solo responsibility for her daughter’s care while her cruise captain husband is away for months on end. Her daughter has a strange illness that causes a severe aversion to food and the round-the-clock treatments don’t seem to be helping. And the family’s situation takes a turn for the worse when the bedroom ceiling of their Montauk apartment collapses and floods the house, forcing her to relocate to a dingy hotel with a hostile clerk (Ivy Wolk) and her friend James (A$AP Rocky) who loiters around Linda’s room. All signs indicate that a breaking point is imminent.