Bonobo presents: VIBE - Black and White Ball

Don your most striking black or white attire and get ready to explore the pleasures of connection, play, and celebration in an inclusive, sex-positive space designed for BIPOC members. This exclusive event is all about embracing your desires, with an emphasis on consent, freedom, and mutual respect. Let’s come together to create unforgettable moments, where you can fully express yourself and enjoy the night with like-minded souls in an electrifying, pleasure-centered experience.

Hey friends,

I’m William, and I’m one of the cofounders of Express Yourself. Express Yourself has been an incredible resource for Black and Brown folks exploring the joys and anxieties of sexuality in a community environment. Over the years, the folks who poured their hearts into creating the Express Yourself parties helped create some of the warmest play spaces I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing and was part of a vibrant emerging ecosystem of sex-positive events built by and for folks of color that included KPOC, SOUL, Black Kink Bay Area, and others.

Recently Express Yourself hasn’t run as frequently as had been planned at the beginning of the year. Rebecca, the remaining organizer, had changing life circumstances and insufficient logistical support to keep it going on her own.

So today I’m announcing that Express Yourself is officially becoming part of Bonobo Network (which I also founded), and it’s getting a new name and new leadership while retaining some of the features that made it special. It’s still a POC-exclusive party. It still uses the PAL system, so Bonobo Network membership isn’t required. And we still expect that the parties will take place about quarterly.

Meet the new producer, Scott! He’s been a dedicated member of our community, volunteering and building meaningful relationships for a couple years. Now, he’s excited to curate unique party experiences for our BIPOC community. Here’s some of what he has to say:

Welcome to VIBE, a reimagined experience designed to create a space of celebration. VIBE stands for Versatile Inclusion, Bold Expressions, embodying a space where diversity thrives, creativity flourishes, and every voice is heard.
Versatile Inclusion: At VIBE, we embrace the rich tapestry of cultures, identities, and experiences that people of color bring to the table. Our events are crafted to be inclusive and welcoming, ensuring that everyone feels seen, valued, and respected. Whether you’re here to dance, connect, or simply be yourself, VIBE is your space to shine.
Bold Expressions: VIBE is all about celebrating the unique and powerful ways BIPOC express themselves. From vibrant performances and art showcases to dynamic discussions and interactive activities, our events are a platform for bold, unapologetic self-expression. We encourage you to bring your full self to the party and share your story with the world.
These exclusive parties are dedicated solely to BIPOC, providing a safe and empowering environment where folks of color can connect, celebrate, and express themselves freely.

Join us at VIBE, where every moment is an opportunity to connect, create, and celebrate the beauty of diversity. Let’s make every event a testament to the power of Versatile Inclusion and Bold Expressions.

For our purposes, we define "person of color" as people who have lived experiences as a racial minority in the United States. At least one birth parent was perceived and treated as a person of color, or would have been were they in the United States.

This party is for people with all levels of experience, from the merely curious or questioning to the most experienced swingers; from the decidedly monogamous to the most committed polyamorists. We welcome people representing every sexual preference, gender expression, and body type. None of us are getting free until we all get free.

Want to see who's going, match, chat, and meet the community? Check out the event on Plura

Sing Before We Vibe is a fantastic way to get to know each other with our clothes on and in a low-pressure environment. You're welcome to bring friends and lovers who've never been to a Bonobo event but who may be interested! VIBE Black and White Ball is a BIPOC only event, however friends and allies are welcome to join us for this meetup.

Ryza House is a private home in Berkeley that is a site for community living, gathering, and organizing. Current residents are all in sex-positive, queer, CNM community, and many are Bonobos. The spaces available for use, including bathrooms and bedrooms open to guests, will be clearly marked by a sign; all other rooms are closed unless otherwise made clear. Parking is on the street on Grizzly Peak Blvd. You'll then walk up a steep driveway or flight of stairs to reach the house (there will be signs). If you have accessibility needs or are dropping off large objects, you can park at the top of the hill or be dropped off by someone there. There are three steps down into the garden to get into the house, after which the whole first floor (which is where the main party will be) is navigable for wheelchairs. The top floor bathroom is not ADA-accessible. There are three floors in the house, with two stairways connecting the floors.

No one can attend the party alone -- every guest will have to be accompanied by at least one PAL (Pervy Activity Liaison). A PAL is not necessarily a date, but it is someone who will have your back for the night and you will have theirs. It's also the PAL's responsibility to hold one another accountable to the norms the space we're creating together. You must arrive at the party together and leave the party together. So for instance, if one person is asked to leave for any reason, their PAL(s) must leave with them.

Join us for an immersive rope bondage class focused on the art of tying with intention, connection, and intimacy. This workshop is designed for beginners and intermediate practitioners looking to explore rope techniques while building trust and communication with their partners.

Safety and Negotiations: We will go over standard safety protocols and body awareness. You’ll learn essential negotiation techniques to ensure that both partners' limits and desires are fully communicated and respected before tying begins.

The Single Column Tie: This foundational tie will be taught as a key technique for creating secure and versatile bonds. We'll cover both the mechanics and practical applications of this tie, ensuring you can execute it safely and confidently.

Lock Off Techniques: Learn how to secure your ties with lock-offs that not only ensure safety but also allow for smooth transitions between positions and movements.

Ipponawa (One Rope Bondage): Discover the beauty of minimalism in rope by using just one rope to create simple yet intimate ties. We'll explore how to use a single rope to evoke deep connection and fluidity in your scene.

Emphasis on Connection and Flow: Throughout the workshop, the focus will be on using rope as a tool for creating emotional and physical connection. We’ll guide you on how to maintain a sense of flow in your tying, using breath, body movement, and eye contact to deepen intimacy and trust with your partner.

Whether you're new to rope or looking to refine your skills, this class will help you develop a deeper understanding of how to blend technical skill with meaningful connection.

Is an immigrant from Guatemala, raised in the bay, & has dedicated many years in the local bay area kink & rope community. He has 10 years of attending events, classes, conventions in the bay area aswell as up & down the west coast. He has volunteered & house topped for various bay area organizations. He has became a part of KPOC (Kinky People of Color) aswell as a host for Kink Y Comunidad in 2023. He strives to make our local kink & rope scene more inclusive, diverse, & accessible. You can find him on Fet @HuffleRough & IG @HuffleRough_

Is a Bay Area Native & enthusiastic student of rope. Entering the Rope Community in 2016 she was able to explore the wonderful world of rope bondage that the Bay Area has to offer. She started co-hosting Bay Area Rope Club only a few months after it was first established starting in Fall of 2016 & has continued to be a friendly face since. Not only is she passionate about rope bondage, but she loves being a community collaborator and is also co-host of BOBAmunch & HaloHaloMuch. She’s a firm believer of investing in their communities, taking up space, and being a champion of accessible rope education & rope bottom education. You can find her on Fet & IG @StarrieNotSorry

Details coming soon!

Volunteering is a great way to meet other Bonobos, and volunteer tickets have discounts baked into them as a thank you for your contribution.

ALL VOLUNTEERS WILL BE REQUIRED TO CHECK IN FOR THEIR SHIFTS and our VOLUNTEER NO-SHOW POLICY will be in effect for all parties

Available roles include:

Pre-Party

• Truck Loading (60 minute shift before party) [$20 ticket]
• Setup (Saturday 9:30am - 11:30am Pre-party) [$30 ticket]

During Party

• Food Support (90 minutes at the beginning of the party) [$30 ticket]
• Greeting (90 minute shifts before and during party) [$40 ticket]
• Angel Crew (60 minute shifts during party) [$40 ticket]
• Cleaning (60 minute shifts during party) [$40 ticket]

Post-Party

• Strike (2 hours Post-Party) [$20 ticket]
• Truck Unloading (90 minute shift post strike or next day) [$20 ticket]

You will receive an email with more details about your role and shift the day before the party.

Tickets for our standard members will be on a sliding scale starting at $65.

Tickets will be on a sliding scale starting at $55 for PrimeMates, our premium members. [PRIMEMATE MEMBERS: You have a special code that you received when you became a member. Use that for your discount.]

***NOTAFLOF Tickets - Action Required (see below)

As we continue to grow and create memorable experiences together, we want to share some important updates regarding the way we manage tickets for our events. Thank you for your feedback about access to tickets and creating ease around ticket transfers. We hope these changes provide a lot better user experience. We are also providing clearer guidelines about use of NOTOFLOF codes and a new request system for those who use those codes.

New Policy Changes:

We hear you loud and clear – tickets for our events have been selling out too fast, and many of you, especially our newer members, haven't had the chance to experience a Bonobo party yet. We're excited to announce some changes that we hope will give everyone a fairer shot at joining the fun.

Supporting Our Community: No One Turned Away for Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) Changes

NOTAFLOF Codes by Request Only

• Over the past few months, we’ve seen NOTAFLOF codes being shared and used in ways that hurt our ability to provide support to members experiencing financial hardship.
• To maintain fairness and prevent misuse, we will be changing the codes for each party. Please email us at before the event to request a NOTAFLOF discount code, no questions asked. You can then apply this code on the day of the ticket drop.

We are committed to inclusivity and accessibility. Our sliding scale ticket pricing remains in place to support those with financial hardship while allowing those with greater means to contribute more. This helps us uphold our No One Turned Away For Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) policy. We would like to offer some examples of what code to use based on need.

25% Off: For those with moderate financial needs. Examples might include:

• Individuals supporting a dependent.
• Those with some medical expenses not covered by insurance.
• Individuals who have periodic financial difficulties but can generally manage their expenses.

50% Off: For those with significant financial constraints. Examples might include:

• Individuals with significant debt or loans.
• Those who receive public assistance or unemployment benefits.
• People with substantial immigration-related expenses.

75% Off: For those with severe financial hardship. Examples might include:

• Single parents or guardians with no additional financial support.
• Those with limited income or support.
• Individuals with large, ongoing medical expenses or disabilities.
• Unpaid community organizers with no disposable income.

:

We are experimenting with a prototype waitlist system. Before requesting a refund, please check the waitlist to see if someone else can take your spot.

While we are working on a better system, we will use a spreadsheet for the waitlist. You can find the link to the waitlist spreadsheet in the Eventbrite event description.

We also want to extend our gratitude to the community members who have been managing this on their own for the last few parties. Your efforts have been invaluable, and we are thrilled to implement a more formal process on our end. We’re also grateful to the handful of community members that are currently volunteering their time to help us design a better waitlist!

Please use the waitlist spreadsheet to sell your ticket, including volunteer tickets. Our Volunteer No Show Policy is now in effect for all parties

Ticket transfers: You can update the info on eventbrite yourself or email [email protected] with the new ticket holder first and last name, email address and phone number. If transferring after final details email and volunteer emails have come out, please forward these communications

Refund Policy:

• We are still working on the details of our official refund policy, including the specifics of our Covid refund policy. Stay tuned for more updates soon.

Thank you for being a part of our community and for your understanding as we experiment and implement these changes.

If your boundaries are crossed at the party, if a Bonobo member acts in ways that are not in accordance with our culture and values, or even if someone just kinda creeps you out, please report the incident to an angel or party host. We also encourage you to file an incident report online.

Incident reports aren't just for consent violations at Bonobo events. If people are behaving in the ways described above outside of parties, it can be helpful for organizers to know.

We no longer have a vaccination policy. You can find our official Covid Policy here: https://www.bonobonetwork.com/covid

• Present a timestamped photo of a covid rapid antigen test taken the day of the event at the door (strongly preferred)
• Bring your own COVID test to take on site. If you use this option, please wear a mask into the venue. There will be a limited supply of rapid tests available for purchase - PLEASE BRING YOUR OWN.
• Buy a COVID test at the time you buy your ticket or on-site.

If you need to take a covid test onsite, you must wear a mask.

What began as a series of small parties in Summer 2010 has grown into a community that has served 3,000 people around the Bay Area and the world. Our community is united by the following principles, which inform how we orient towards the spaces we share and how we treat one another:

High Possibility, Low Expectation: Our communities are best when they're treated as high possibility, low expectation spaces. That means two things: first, that all kinds of awesome sexy interactions are possible, but that no one should be expected to interact with you in any particular way. No one owes you anything. Second, we often attend these events with an expectation of the type or quality of experience we should have. While anything is possible, you'll probably have a much better experience if you lose those expectations of yourself and open yourself up to the abundance of connection of all kinds available to you at the party. Low expectation DOES NOT mean "low desire" – we believe it's helpful to have a well-explored and articulated sense of what you want and to hold those desires lightly.

Trust and Integrity: Parties like ours are built on trust – that's what allows us to be as open and welcoming and vulnerable as we can be inside those spaces. But this requires that we all show up in full integrity, pledging to be our most trustworthy. Three important implications of this : keep the identities of folks at our events confidential, proactively disclose relevant safer sex risks, and take exquisite care of the venues, spaces, and neighborhood ecosystems that host us.

Consent: We agree that we will only physically engage with one another, including nonsexual touch, where there is CLEAR CONSENT. We define consent as an ongoing collaboration between two or more people in constant verbal, physical, and emotional dialogue about what each other needs to safely, willingly, and pleasurably interact with one another. Gold standard consent in Bonobo Network is affirmative, informed, unpressured, specific, competently given, and ongoing. Respecting and valuing consent isn't just about preventing violations that shred trust -- it's also about making sure that everyone has as much space as they need to fully occupy their yes. Please read our Consent and Accountability Policy (https://bit.ly/bonoboconsentpolicy) for more details on how we approach consent and accountability.

High Challenge, High Support: Play parties can be challenging and emotionally complex, even for seasoned veterans. We’re committed to making the play parties we throw high challenge, high support environments. We come together to celebrate and play at our edges. To fully support that endeavor, we provide a dedicated nonsexual space at each party for folks who need to get away from the intensity of the gathering. It means recruiting a team of angels who are available to provide counseling and social support throughout the party. And it means encouraging everyone who attends to commit to being an angel for everyone around them.

Here's a guide to have a pre-party conversation with your sweetie(s) to make your party go smoothly for both of you: https://bit.ly/beingpartyready

Everyone Contributes: Parties like this are never the work of a single organizer -- it takes the participation and contribution of a host of people. Everyone who attends is expected to co-create the party: money, time, energy, enthusiasm, work, intention, example, concern and/or awareness.

Inclusion: We are dedicated to fostering inclusion in our community. No matter your race, ethnicity, gender identity, or class background, we want everyone who participates in this community to understand that they belong here, and that they have as much of a stake in what happens here as anyone else does. While we recognize that everyone is on a learning curve when it comes to learning how to foster such an atmosphere, we also commit to a stance of learning -- and supporting one another's learning -- of how to be excellent to one another.

This is a dynamic list, ever growing, changing, and deepening as this grand experiment in connection continues. Thanks to you all for playing mad scientist with us.

Event Venue

Berkeley, CA, United States